After House Republicans released their "Pledge to America," Democrats reacted quickly by drawing up their own "Promise to America." The Unreligious Right has obtained an exclusive preview of the top ten points.
1. Spend more money. Despite all the evidence that more spending has not produced job growth, more needs to be spent -- whether we have it available or not. That's why we have a mint & the federal reserve. No matter how much Republicans want to spend, we promise to always spend more.
2. Ignore the debt & the deficit. Focus on right now and the future will take care of itself.
3. Find new ways to raise taxes. We'll do everything possible to create new taxes, even if we have to call them something else.
4. Attack any significant tax cut as tax cuts for the "rich." Rich means whoever we say it means.
5. Equate tax cuts with spending. Even though tax cuts are reductions in revenue and are not spending of any kind, we will continue to call them costs so we can say they cost too much.
6. Create new government programs. America needs more and bigger government. There is no problem that can't be solved by the government. Greater government involvement in everything will be our first resort.
7. Increase funding regardless of returns. This means more spending on education and unproven alternative energy sources.
8. If we absolutely have to make any cuts in spending, look first to cutting defense. National security is our least important priority.
9. Increase regulation, red tape and bureaucracy. Small businesses don't need tax cuts. They need more rules, requirements, fees and government oversight. They can count on the Democratic Party to provide those things.
10. Find new ways to dismiss any and all criticism or counter-proposals from political opponents as based on racism, bigotry, fear, support for the rich, or as un-American.