Tuesday, July 14, 2009

10 Things that Are OK for Democrats but not Republicans

1.  Lying.  Most of the Democrats hyperventilating about the supposed lies of George W. Bush are strangely unconcerned with lies by Obama and other Democrats. That's because lies from Democrats are either no big deal, or necessary to guide the public in the right direction for its own good.

2.  Spreading Fear.  We heard quite a bit about "fearmongering" from Democrats outraged that the Bush administration, especially figures like Dick Cheney and Karl Rove, was using concern with national security for political purposes. We still hear that same charge every time a Republican points out how Obama's policies are weakening the U.S. and making us more vulnerable to a terrorist attack. But what about spreading hysterical fear about environmental disaster in order to ram through a massive expansion of government power? Well, that's no big deal. How about scaring people about economic collapse? Healthcare? It's ok when Democrats do it.

3.  Executive Power.  Remember how Democrats were so concerned about the Bush administration increasing executive power? Now that the Obama administration is in power, any increase is quite alright. While I'm writing this Obama has probably appointed a couple more "czars."

4.  Calling Opponents Un-American, Un-Patriotic, or Traitors.  Democrats are hypersensitive to the slightest implication that any of their actions or views could be seen as un-american, un-patriotic, or treasonous. Any comment by a Republican that could in any way be interpreted as such a slur is greeted with extreme outrage. But Democrats have no problem openly calling Republicans un-American, un-patriotic or traitors. Ask Paul Krugman and Henry Waxman. And then of course there were the eight years of accusing the Bush administration of everything under the sun in the most graphic terms possible. But that's ok. It's only bad when Republicans do it.

5.  Illegality.  Even now Democrats are oh so upset at the possibility that illegal actions might have been committed during the Bush administration. Nevermind that the president was trying to defend the U.S. in wartime, and that his actions all fell within legal gray areas. We have to protect the "rule of law"! But what about when a Democratic president blatantly commits perjury in office to protect himself from the consequence of his own idiotic lack of judgment and reckless behavior? Well, that's just lying about sex. No big deal. What about when President Obama appoints multiple people who cheat on their taxes to high office, including the head of the treasury no less? No problem. After all, they are Democrats. Strict adherence to the law is only important for Republicans.

6.  Politicizing Science.  Isn't it amazing how this is no longer a problem now that Democrats control the government? Using only scientific views that support your policies and suppressing opposing ones is now a good thing.

7. Disenfranchising Voters. The slightest hint that Democratic voters might have been intimidated or otherwise deprived of their vote is an outrage. Even the fact that some are too stupid to fill out a ballot properly is an intolerable case of disenfranchisment. But any allegations of disenfranchisement or voter intimidation involving Republican voters can be dismissed out of hand. Who cares?

8.  Racism & Sexism.  Racism and sexism are only bad when Republicans are doing it (even if only imagined). In fact, we need to parse every word of any Republican for racist & sexist implications.  But if an outspoken Republican happens to be a woman or a minority, sexist and racist attacks are quite alright. 

9.  Conspiracy Theories.  Conspiracy theories held by Republicans are clearly ridiculous, such as the many involving Obama.  But what about conspiracy theories about the Bush administration, Dick Cheney, the "vast right-wing conspiracy," and other Republicans? Well, there might be something to those.

10. Hypocrisy. This should go without saying. Democrats delight in accusing Republicans of hypocrisy at every opportunity, despite being massive hypocrites themselves. But of course like everything else on this list, hypocrisy is ok if you are a Democrat.

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